What do you need most this holiday season?
Several years ago, on a Saturday morning, around 5 am, I woke up to sweats and major fatigue. I began crying as my mind was all over the place, my emotions were out of control, and I had no peace. I was thinking about the organization I was a part of and my role as a Youth Pastor. Panic and anxiety were taking over me every time I thought of it. I was quite overwhelmed and through tears and discomfort realized at that moment that I couldn’t go any further. I leaned over to my wife and said, “I don’t want to do this anymore.”
For years, I had run with great passion. I, along with the help of God, had built an amazing team—from 30 volunteers to over 150 volunteers, and from 120 students to over 1,000 in attendance weekly. I hosted major conferences with great success, traveled extensively, and led everything into a beautiful place while I was drowning inside. Somewhere in the process of fulfilling my assignment, I had neglected the most important part: me, and ultimately, even my family. Unfortunately, it was too late before I even noticed that I was a victim of burnout. I decided at that moment to walk away from an organization I loved. I was so burnt out that I didn’t even take a sabbatical; I resigned completely. Nobody ever thought I’d leave, my departure sent shockwaves through the system.
Burnout often creeps in unnoticed and slowly robs us of our joy, our energy, our passion, and our effectiveness in ministry. It often occurs when we have had too much of one thing for too long without priorities, boundaries, or balance. Our culture, like many around the world, prioritizes a strong work ethic over spiritual maturity. While a good work ethic is essential, without priorities, boundaries, and balance, it can suck the life out of us. That’s what happened to me.
I realized that even the most dependable ministers with the greatest anointing still need priorities, boundaries, and balance. Oftentimes, within our Christian culture, we are driven to serve God with all that we have and believe that God will take care of everything else. Yes, God will take care of us, our families, and will even honor our sacrifice. But ignoring our well-being and relationships with our loved ones for the sake of the Kingdom is not a sign of spiritual maturity. Priorities, boundaries, and balance are what give us the ability to serve God’s people and build God’s Kingdom. If we don’t have those things, we will slowly be led to a midnight moment crying out, 'I don’t want to do this anymore.’
If we want to accomplish more, keeping God first, family second, and all else after that allows more room for God’s strength to be our energy. If we aren’t operating in God’s strength, will, grace, and anointing, then we’re probably operating in our own. When we do this, we are missing out on the best peace and rest that comes from surrendering our control to God’s control and our will to God’s will.
Have you made your job, your church, or your calling a priority over yourself?
Have you neglected your relationship with God?
Have you led others to the source of peace while neglecting the source for yourself? How do you avoid burnout? Make God and your relationship with Him the priority.
Though life is hard, it becomes even more challenging when we choose to live it our way, without relying on God’s marvelous grace that has already been given to us. Since God loves us, God doesn’t coerce us; rather, God allows us to make our own choices. However, going our way causes us to drift out of God’s will and grace, leading us to do things alone without God. This is referred to as self-will, simply put, it is disobedience, and it comes with consequences. One such consequence is Spiritual Burnout - not being in the center of God’s will for your life. God loves you, and God allows you to choose whether to follow God’s will or step out of it and do things your way. Are you making that choice?
Here’s a good rule to help you prioritize: 'G.F.B.' (God 1st, Family 2nd, and Business 3rd.) We have to prioritize like this to keep the important things first while letting the other busyness of life take its proper place. Without priorities, boundaries, and balance, we can experience a loss of energy and exhaustion; a lack of empathy and cynicism; reduced effectiveness or productivity. That can even lead to depression, resentment, and a negative outlook in an area that once gave purpose, meaning, and even joy to our lives.
If we don’t establish the right boundaries and make the difficult decisions to slow down and prioritize self-care (as in - CHOOSE YOU), we will eventually experience burnout, ministering from an empty spirit – a dangerous state for leadership. An empty spirit is where you are constantly giving without replenishing, neglecting to receive and fill yourself back up.
What do you need most this holiday season? I want to encourage you to pause and give yourself that gift. Whether it’s prioritizing God and yourself or something else - spoil yourself. You deserve to be happy, filled with joy, and to enjoy life to the fullest. Jesus expressed that He came to give you 'life in abundance.' As stated in John 10:10 (AMPC), Jesus says, 'The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows).' The Scriptures declare that it is the enemy who seeks to rob us of the abundant life; Jesus, on the other hand, came to give us this richness. This is God’s will for you. It is not God’s intention for you to live in burnout and defeat.
I have personally changed the way I approach life and ministry. I prioritize time for myself and God. Every Monday is my Sabbatical day — a time for rest. I engage in activities such as reading, biking, watching movies, sleeping, or whatever I feel like doing. I intentionally put my phone away and stay off social media, disconnecting to truly connect with myself. Periodically, I take staycations to completely disconnect from the world. My wife and I explore our city, pretending we are on vacation. Near my home, there's a lake I visit almost weekly. I sit in stillness, pray, and absorb the beauty around me. All of these practices bring me a sense of balance and peace.
Don’t let ministry become the mistress to your family. While that's a whole other subject, in a nutshell, don’t let ministry and leadership burn you out to the point where you have nothing left to give to your first ministry — your family, including your parents, siblings, spouse, children, grandchildren, and more. I care deeply for all of you and hope this serves as a reminder to take a break
Click here and you'll find a few scriptures to download and meditate on as you continue this journey.
Love,
Mike Owens
